Holy shit! The Fantastic Mr. Fox Trailer is out!

And now a small child covering Johnny Cash.

I went boating today.

if I hear that God Damn phrase "I'm on a boat" one more time I'm going to impale said speaker of the phrase.


Because I heard that fucking song WHILE I was on a boat in someone else's boat.


ALSO

I'm noticing a common trend of douchery (which if my theory can be validated) in which large wakeboard-toting boats with large speakers that enunciate their imposed music on the rest of Yale Lake always seem to play out really shitty 80s rock.


And I'm pretty sure I can prove a correlation here. Give me time.

Bruce Springsteen saved rock & roll.

KISS is a fucking abomination.



That is all.





Oh, and the world would be better without stripped down ballads.

Saturday Night

I would suggest clicking on the link

Wuh-BAM!

I just figured it out!

"Entourage" is basically a cheesy primetime soap opera for men.

What the hell? How did I not figure that out?

It's got horrible dialogue, predictable plots, and the storyline goes in circles?

Dammit! I've been had!

Also I'll probably watch it next week... and "Hung" too

I, apparently, can speak perfect Russian.

Now if I can only remember what it was I saying in Russian...

Job? No. Alcohol, Books and HBO? Yes. This is the summer album suggestions of 2009.

First off the Original Vanguard: the ones I forgot to mention for some reason or another.

Radiohead "Hail To The Thief" -Let's not get confused here. I still don't like Radiohead. BUTTTT... I do fucking love this album. A great timepiece and ripe for booty (at least that's what Thom Yorke said about it)

The Thrills "So Much For The City" & "Let's Bottle Bohemia" -The Thills are five guys from Ireland who came here to start some baroque-ish shit. Instead they spent half a year in San Diego and decided to start making a shitload of sunshine indie pop that strictly talked about California and California-related materials. This is usually best to listen while you're working.

Recent Inductees:

Dr. Dog "We All Belong" -Great. Great. Great.

Vampire Weekend "Vampire Weekend"

Bruce Springsteen "Born To Run" -For road trips. I mean, it's ok for hanging out

The Velvet Underground "Loaded"

Eddie Vedder "Into The Wild: Music from the Motion Picture" -I think what originally drew me in was the fact that everything about the actual movie is so intricately done. What's better is it's Eddie Vedder and even after you're done with the movie you can still feel the vibe behind this movie.

Maplewood "Maplewood" -I don't think it's necessary to really go there again.

Beck "Modern Guilt" -Nothing left me happier while I was scrubbing toilets for the government last summer.

The New Alumni

Thin Lizzy "Jailbreak" -This is one of those timepieces that you weren't there for but you can still feel it.

The Magnetic Fields "69 Love Songs" -Now it's hard to go through this entire album in one sitting. That why it's best to stave off about 30 a day. It's hard to comprehend how they can literally do 69 songs and still have the entire album tie together.

T. Rex "Electric Warrior" -Hedonistic rock comes to an apex if you get drunk to this on someone's property

Peter Frampton "Frampton Comes Alive" -This is obvious, but it needs to be said. Sunsets work the best with this, especially with close friends.

Neko Case "Middle Cyclone" -I had a dream just before I came home for the summer about this. I drove the same car out to an abandoned strip mall (much like the one in the album art inside of the cd) and i was isolated for miles by grass fields on a very hot day. I lit up a cigarette and looked out around me and pondered my existence for about five minutes, and then I woke up. Oh, and it's Neko fucking Case.

M. Ward "Hold Time" -My substitution for She & Him, as that album is growing me weary.

Grizzly Bear "Veckatimist" -I have this weird thing where this song comes on during rainstorms in the summer. Also that weird foghorn noise in the background of "Two Weeks" sounds a lot like the giant car from "Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory" that expels tons of soda foam at its passengers. AND because I use to watch that move all the time during the summer when I was a little kid, "Veckatimist" gets to be on my summer summer suggestion list.

Floating Action "Floating Action" -I listened to this once in April and thought immediately "Shit this will be great to listen to on a boat. It was.

The Format "Dog Problems" -This goes back to last summer and the whimsical side reality. A litte poppy but still just barely serious enough to take seriously.

The Violent Femmes "The Violent Femmes" -I think because the lyrics match up so closely to how much I miss my girlfriend that I like this so much (Yes, even "Add it Up")

Dinosaur Jr. "Farm" -Dinosaur Jr. just has that kind of feeling anyways that perpetuates great memories.

Built To Spill "There's Nothing Wrong With Love" -Great for driving around Eastern Washington, I've decided. (They're from Boise, and the vibe is just right)

Van Morrison "Astral Weeks" -You know what, I don't think I even need to explain because this album is just that good.

Stevie Wonder "Music Of My Mind" -Brimming optimism just makes this that much better. I know a lot of people get turned off because his 80/90s music is just crap. But back in the 70s he really had something going.

I'm Up Here.

Yesterday I was eating a sandwich and listening to The White Stripes' cover of "Jolene" on the TV (any given Sunday...).

"Your beauty is beyond compare
With flaming locks of auburn hair
With ivory skin and eyes of emerald green
Your smile is like a breath of spring
Your voice is soft like summer rain
And I cannot compete with you, jolene"

Now there are two thoughts going through my head:

-the first being "That sounds really hot and descriptive. Well done, Dolly Parton"

-the second is "Evolutionary theory would say that Dolly Parton would be most likely the victor. Really, she has the largest mammary glands in country music (40-DD according to the wikipedia and after rigorous debate with my sister). I think she could persuade her man away from Jolene fairly easily.

Favorite Parton quote: [On her plastic surgeries] "It takes a lot of money to look this cheap"

And another thing!

Who in the hell made it the status quo for a 20 year old college student to fuck everything that moves?

What kills me is the fact that it's like this assumption that going poon-crazy at 20 creates some sort of maturity.  What is that?

I love sex.  Obviously.  It's a biological function.  And I really hate people who repress it by simplifying with procreation or purity.  But trying to rationalize it synonymously between hedonism and maturity doesn't make sense.  Especially in sexual prime.

What the hell, every married person in their 40s?

I can't sleep.

I've only been to three weddings in my entire life.  This last one was a little more impacting, partially because it was at my house (and thus spun everyone into a vortex)

I've noticed a trend lately of every married person I've known forever reiterating to NOT get married.  I'm completely baffled at the concept of legal certification of monogamy and love.

The reason I'm baffled is because both dynamics of marriage seem to deteriorate.  I'm not sure but I think it just may be my environment.  Where is that "connection"? What is that bond that people speak of? How do you "just know"?  Is it even possible with objective cognition?

What's even worse is after three shots of tequila (the reason I love my extended family is because they have no problem substituting various cliches for better ideas i.e. tequila shots instead of champagne toasts) and several coronas, my father and (now married) uncle made me realize that I'm am most-likely the next person to get married with the Nowak name.

I'm not sure how to feel about that.  I look at the newest marriage in my family and I see two people so engorged by the idea of being in love that other logistical and emotional necessities seemed to be completely negated.

I see most other veteran marriages successful but with such hostilities that the tension just seems to build as the anniversaries go by.

And I see just a couple shimmering glimpses of beautiful marriages, but here's my problem; those few amazing beautiful marriages, I feel no relation personality-wise to those people.  

The most successful marriages I've witnessed are through people who are incredibly introverted and quiet and don't seem to open up much about themselves.  I love talking about why I love somebody to everybody.  I love telling everybody about every little facet.  Is this the inherency?

And if so does that completely solve the quandaries?

Now it's 2:21 in the morning.